I’VE asked the council nicely and it has agreed that we can have a bigger dustbin because we have a silly number of children.

It’s a positive side of domestic overcrowding that you rarely hear about. We are excitedly awaiting a 360-litre megabin which will replace the standard 240-litre large ice cream tub we had before.

As well as holding more rubbish, the larger bin is big enough for parents to climb inside and hide when things get too much during the school holiday period.

I knew I had to act when I nearly fell off the bins while trying to stamp the rubbish down one Thursday morning. I did have a big stick which I used to push the rubbish down, but a boy chopped the stick up with the axe.

“Why did you chop up my rubbish pokey stick with the axe?” I asked.

“Dunno, wanted to chop up something,” was the reply.

I’ve moved the axe.

We may need the bigger bin soon if the Mail Online is to be believed.

“Loom band craze is an ‘eco ticking time-bomb’,” the headline screamed.

It has something to do with loom bands being dropped on the floor, apparently. Getting the words loom band and bomb in the same headline takes talent when you consider the craze is all about making jewellery from colourful little rubber bands.

On a brighter note, the national park authority announced this week that the Dales’ numbers of fine-lined pea mussel and roundmouthed whorl snail are doing good.

Will we soon be finding dead little whorl snails which have become tangled in discarded loom band bracelets?

“Loom band rare snail carnage,” the headline will say.

Finally, the offer of free publicity for community groups was a big success. This week I am delighted to advise that the Wensleydale Railway is looking for volunteers to help out with things like retail, catering and administration.

In a bid to make this first appeal a success I’ve come up with a couple of advertising slogans. Got some spare time?

Come and serve some wine.

Have an interest in rail? Help sort the mail.

Short of cash? Get a job, as we’re only looking for free help.