IT’S a mystery that is gripping the nation. Well, when I say nation, I actually mean Leyburn, and when I say Leyburn, I suppose I really mean Maythorne and when I say Maythorne ... OK, it's just me that's gripped – and if I'm being totally honst, I'm only quite interested.

Loosely held rather the gripped I suppose.

So whose dog is leaving giant turds around the estate? A bit of dog poo is common in the lanes around the town but these deposits are noteworthy because of their size and prevalence.

I suppose you can't blame the animal, so the question should really be which owner is failing to pick up after their huge dog?

The turds have been spotted near the primary school which makes the failure to scoop particularly unpleasant.

In a lane between Brentwood and Maythorne, the giant turds have come to attention of district council officials who have put up tiny little signs next to the mess urging someone to dob in the culprit.

It was suggested that if they had the time to bend down and erect a tiny sign, they could also have scooped up the poo, but this would surely just encourage the flagrant breach.

Apparently, the name of a potential culprit has been bandied around on a wellknown social networking site, but my file at the Press Complaint Commission is thick enough without me repeating the allegation here.

Moving over the tops into Swaledale, I was thrilled to read a Yorkshire Dales National Park Authority report on a barn being turned into a house without planning permission.

It was an experience similar to that of an animal documentary maker who had just found tracks from a lion they feared had been shot by poachers.

Could it be? Barn turned into house without planning permission.

Windows, doors and a stove installed. Django, is it you? Could it really be? Will I finally be able to use the “Django rides again” pun?

Sadly not. The barn is owned by a bloke from Richmond called Bill or Billy or Mac or Buddy. The search continues.